“If you really knew me, you wouldn’t trust me.”
The thought passed across her mind—again.
“If you really knew me, you wouldn’t trust me. I mean take a look at me. Here I am again, needing to make money again this month. I managed to pull it out last month. And sure, I paid all my bills, and I even hired that new assistant I know I needed. But here I am again back at nearly zero at the beginning of the month. It’s just a few days away, and I can see it coming. How can anyone trust me to help them with their money, when I keep being in this position myself? I say I’m a money coach, but what a crock that is!”
“How can anyone trust me? I say I’m a healer, but look at me! I’m sick again! I’m tired, I have a cold, and my leg hurts. If people really saw what my life is like, they would never trust me to help them. I mean, who do I think I am to help others when I keep having so many troubles myself? I mean, I’m not very believable, am I, when I can’t even heal myself?”
“Yeah, right. So I say I’m all about women’s empowerment, right? And I can’t even speak up clearly about what I want in my relationship! I did it again. I let myself do what he wants instead of saying what I want. It’s such a frigging habit, I can’t stand it! Sure, I enjoyed myself. It’s not like I don’t like those people or want to spend time with his friends. It’s just that I also want to do other things that are more what I enjoy. I can’t believe it. If people were to see how I don’t stand up for myself, they would never want to work with me. I mean, I wouldn’t work with me—I am so lame sometimes!”
Ouch. Double, triple ouch. Unfortunately thoughts like these are all too common. They can eat away at you, carving out your confidence from the inside. They can lead you to want to take more courses, get more certifications, and withdraw from doing the outreach and invitations you need to make to make your business a success.
Do you ever feel like a fraud, like if people REALLY knew, they wouldn’t trust you or hire you?
Okay, B R E A T H E.
The good news is that you are not alone . . .
This pattern of thought—a common belief system—is not only not true in any real sense, it’s probably not even yours!
This is an archetypal attitude—let’s call her Felicia the Fraud. No matter how well things are actually going, no matter how many people she has actually served to lead better lives, no matter how far she’s actually come in her own development, this nagging habit of thought casts aside all of that.
-> Yes, of course, it’s that “not good enough” or “not enough” script.
Here’s another piece of good news. . .
All of that is changing now. Faster and more powerfully than ever.
You know you’re living in a time of unprecedented change. The energy of this time supports you to let go of these outdated thought forms faster and more deeply than ever.
And yes, that’s what is making everyday life so frigging intense. You can feel it in your bones. And just as part of you longs for that greater freedom, another part resists the change.
Here’s what I recommend:
See your patterns. Love yourself anyway. See your “short-comings.” Accept yourself anyway. Notice the punishing voice in your head of Felicia the Fraud. Embrace yourself—and her—anyway.
B R E A T H E, go inside, relax.
- Remember the look on your client’s face when she turned to you with that deep gratitude because of the work you had done together.
- Remember how altered you all were by your facilitation during your last experience with your group.
- Remember how on purpose and right with life you feel when you are engaged with what you do best.
If I really knew you, I would be awed by your LIGHT.